SWAGE on Marriage Vows

Marriage is suppose to legitimize sex. Right?

Everyone knows this rule. But what happens when this breaks down??? You promised to be faithful in body to one person, but they are not there faithfully for you. What are you suppose to do?

Fidelity has to be recognized as a two-way street. It's more than a unilateral promise to NOT HAVE sex with others, it's really a bilateral promise to HAVE sex with your partner. But what does one do when one's partner does not share one's drive for sex? Just because your partner is not interested, that does nothing to relieve your need for sex.

The spouse is the only "acceptable" sexual outlet within the marriage contract. (And the marriage contract is the only "acceptable" sexual outlet by society.) That being the case, then by taking on the role of sole sex outlet, this obligates all participants to fulfill their duty when sex is desired.

It has been said that sex is the glue that keeps a marriage together. Many marriages fall apart because the glue is gone.

How can the marriage adapt, so that it might survive?

SWAGE Assumptions

1) That the sex drive is a natural phenomena.
Furthermore: that the sex drive varies from person to person, and that it varies for each person throughout their life.

2) That the sex drive is autonomic in nature. It is not subject to conscious control by the individual. What is subject to control by the individual, is how the sex drive is responded to.

3) Given the first two beliefs, we do not believe anyone should be apologetic for the sex drive that they have, not intolerant to the sex drive that others might have.

4) Life is short; every individual should do what ever they can to optimize their life experience. There is no sense in letting a single moment be wasted. If one is
suffering then one must take action to get relief.

5) No one can give up their right to be. A marriage vow is not a surrender of one's individuality; it is instead a commitment of two individuals to the continual partnership in the mutual advancement of each other's life experience.

6) People for the most part do not change; therefore, they should be accepted for what they ARE, not for what they could be, or say they will become.

7) People find a way to do that which they want to do. We all have to prioritize what we do in our lives, therefore, what ever it is that we are doing, must be the thing that prioritized out at the top.

8) Sex is not love, and love is not sex. Even so, the two are intertwined. Every individual should endeavor to know the difference and respond accordingly.

9) Responsibility comes from the word respond. A responsibility is an obligated response to a given situation. Within sexual contacts, one has on obligated response to at all times safeguard one�s partner(s) from harm, specifically STD�s.

10) Within parenting, one has an obligated response to provide for the raising of the child into a happy, well adjusted, self-sufficient adult that will contribute to the fabric of society.

SWAGE wants to combat these major problems:

1) Mismatched Sexual Expectations
2) Unrequited Lust
3) Sexual Repression
4) Sexual Deprivation
5) Sexual Extortion
6) Sexual Incompatibility
7) Unfulfilled Fantasies
8) Unsafe Alternatives


If this strikes a cord with you, please leave a comment or feel free to join us at:

http://groups.yahoo.com/group/swage

SWAGE BELIEVES:

1) There is a basic human need for affection (love).
2) There is a basic human need for physical affection (sex).
3) It has been said that sex without love is empty, but love without sex can be even worse.

If this strikes a cord with you, leave a comment or feel free to join us at:

http://groups.yahoo.com/group/swage

James

SWAGE is made up of men and women that:

1) In love with our spouses - we are soul mated. But we have much
stronger sex drives than our mates, and they therefore do not fulfill
our sexual needs.
2) Even though our suffering can be quite intense, we do not leave our
spouses for others who might better fulfill our sexual needs because:
a) we love our spouses, and don't want to make their lives a hell.
b) we love our children, and don't want to make their lives a hell.
c) we love our extended families, and don't want to make their lives
a hell.
3) Fed up with being sexually frustrated during the day, and
especially fed up with having to go to sleep night after night frustrated.
4) Fed up with being misdiagnosed as sexaholics.
5) Fed up with not being able to talk about or do anything about the
problem.

If this sounds like you, leave a comment or feel free to join us at:

http://groups.yahoo.com/group/swage

James